Beyond the School Bell

by Angela Scott

In her column, Parenting Solo, Angela Scott will share her journey of balancing parenting duties, work and downtime activities, while keeping up with her two daughters, Shani (8) and Samara (5). Parenting Solo will take you inside the home, mind, heart and soul of this working single mom who’s found the role as a single parent to be a rewarding mix of blessings and blues. “It’s an incredible blessing that calls for supernatural resources,” she says. Angela invites you to write to her at shaniadura@netzero.net.


It's a well-known fact that children perform better in school when their parents are actively involved. I make it a point every year to introduce myself to my children's teachers. I tell them that I am a single parent and make myself available for scheduled and impromptu chats. Why? I want teachers to feel comfortable reaching out to me. Even though my daily 8 to 5 grind may be a bit overwhelming at times, what happens to my kids at school is still important. Most single dads that I know feel the same way.

"I join the PTA at the beginning of every year, and I volunteer to be a parent in the class once a month," says Darrell Pennyman, 45, a single father. He believes that his school activism provides a positive role model for not just his son, but other families, especially fathers, who Pennyman says are few and far on school campuses. Pennyman has been the primary caregiver of son, Darrell Jr. (DJ), since the 14 year-old was two months old. The number of single fathers in the U.S. is growing.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, among the 11.9 million single parents in 1998, men comprised 1 in 6 ­ a number that grew 25 percent between 1995 and 1998. In a 2000 U.S. Census Bureau study, "Two-Parent Versus Single-Father Families," various statistics on single dads were compiled. The 2000 study says that in 1998 there were 3.1 million kids being raised by single fathers, with only with 63 percent caring for one child under 18 and 11 percent caring for two or more children.

A definite shift in the landscape of single-parent homes is taking place. Dads are working aside moms, packing lunches, playing taxi driver, helping with homework and nurturing kids with typical "mommy" tasks.

"I think if you don't get involved in your child's education, it's a loss," says Pennyman. Although the city worker rises as early as 3 a.m. for his job as a garbage collector, he often reschedules his work hours to allow time to volunteer at his son's school. "I sometimes take days off just to be a designated driver for field trips." David Norman, a 32-year-old supervisor social worker is the primary custodian of David II, age 12. Norman was a single parent for 10 years prior to marrying a second time. He says participating in the school process is crucial in demonstrating to children that what they do is important.

"All of my son's teachers know me and know that they can call me for anything ­ good or bad," Norman says. "Your child learns everything from you. If he or she sees that you're interested in school, they will be too."

Considering all the things parents can contribute to their child¹s school process, helping with homework is the most rewarding, and often the most difficult.

Beat Homework Blues
Solving algebraic expressions and deconstructing sentences can be a nightmare for many. "I used to find myself getting frustrated while trying to help DJ. I couldn't understand why he wasn't comprehending what I was saying," Pennyman recalls. It was shortly after speaking with a family friend, who's also a teacher that Pennyman learned his son had difficulty in processing information. "That's when I really got involved. We followed an IEP (Individualized Education Plan) plan and got DJ the tutoring help that he needed," Pennyman says.

The National Association for Education (www.nea.org/parents) recommends reintroducing kids to the joys of reading. Knowing your child's reading level and interest will make trips to libraries more productive. NEA also has recommended reading lists based upon grades, interests and ethnicities. With so many options, it's easy to make reading aloud an adventure versus a chore. Look for ways to bring the stories to life such as designing crafts or recreating swashbuckling characters from favorite books. Early readers can read about Whoville and other Dr. Seuss tales on www.Seussville.com (http://www.Seussville.com), where famous Seuss journeys are retold with interactive games and activities. By encouraging interactive comprehension, the world of reading takes on a whole new adventure. Hopefully, your child will be inspired to take journeys beyond the black-and-white pages of his fourth-grade reading assignment.


1 | 2